Don't Mess With Texas

So, I realized something startling tonight. In my 31 years of life, I have spent 15 of them in Utah, 8 of them in Las Vegas, and 8 1/2 of them in Texas. And I realized tonight that I have become a Texan. This is sobering in many ways. I've always enjoyed living here, but I really love it now. For those of you who have never been to Texas, and don't know a Texan, let me explain something. Texans are EXTREMELY proud of their state, and everything that entails. Let me tell you some of the things that I have learned while living here: 1. Texans live and breathe by their sports. We have the Dallas Cowboys, the Dallas Mavericks, the San Antonio Spurs, and the Houston Rockets. Can you name one other state that has that many high profile teams? Do you like college sports? We've got UT to cover that one. Of course, we do have the Texas Rangers, but we don't talk about them much . . . 2. Texans are some of the friendliest people I have ever met. You haven't lived until a guy in a cowboy hat calls you ma'am. 3. Don't EVER tell a Texan that Alaska is bigger. Because in their opinion, Alaska doesn't count because it doesn't even touch the United States. 4. If you serve a mission in Texas, it is not wise to infer in any way that Utah is better than Texas. You might get yelled at. In fact, I wouldn't suggest even hinting that you like somewhere better than Texas. Us Texans don't take too politely to foreigners who vocally state they prefer to be somewhere else. Just keep it to yourself. :-) 5. While we don't have mountains (one of my few complaints about Texas), there is more than enough stuff to make up for it. From the beaches down south, to Sea World, to rodeos, there is always something you can do, or somewhere you can go. 6. Y'all really is a word, and people really do say it. 7. Not all Texans speak in a drawl or twang. In fact, most of them don't drive trucks with longhorns on them or have cowboy hats. Texans are actually pretty normal people, other than their obsession with their state. 8.  How many of you other states were your own country at one time?  Yeah, I didn't think so. 9.  Remember the Alamo.   Does the Alamo have a basement?  If you lived here, you would know.  (Or you could just rent Pee Wee's Big Adventure . . . "The stars at night, are big and bright [clap clap clap clap] DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS!"  Come on, you know you saw that movie when you were a kid!) So, that is my list. I am now one of these people. I am fiercely defensive of my state, and I think it's the best place in the world to live. So, whatever y'all do, don't mess with Texas!